Tuesday, December 3, 2013

Pitch Wars: Resistance is Futile

Like so many (many, many, MANY) others, Betsy and I have cast our hardworking, critique-loving hats into the ring, and entered our YA paranormal novel Essex Hill into Pitch Wars. What are Pitch Wars? It’s a contest run by the fabulous Brenda Drake (http://www.brenda-drake.com) and her team of slush-tastic readers that pairs published/agented authors, editors, or interns with writers hoping to woo agents. 

Many of the contest entrants are posting reasons why the participating mentors should choose them– all under the hashtag #PimpMyBio. So, since all the cool kids are doing it, Betsy and I thought we’d dust off the jazz hands, polish the tap shoes, and tell you why you should pick us.

We’re Ready for Boot Camp
We’re hardworking, perfectionist, team-players who aren’t just here to be told how amazing we are. Our egos are way in the back of the hall closet along with those roller blades, just in case roller blading ever makes a comeback. We WANT criticism and feedback and a swift kick in the ass. We’re ready and willing to murder our darlings and rip our manuscript apart, poke at its guts with a stick, and put it all back together like some bionic-super-story: better, stronger, faster.

Collective Consciousness
We’ve been friends for over 20 years and in that time we have collaborated on numerous creatively challenging projects – from producing a weird downtown Shakespeare adaptation in an old deli on the Lower East Side, to battling one of the most obnoxious landlords in all of NYC, and planning each other’s weddings just three months apart, and of course, novel writing – so we know how to work together. Over the years we have developed a highly sophisticated, possibly psychic process for sharing ideas, critiquing each other’s writing, and coming up with a finished product we both really dig. It’s at the point now where we feel a bit like the Borg – our hive mind generates this work and we often can’t recall who wrote what or where certain ideas came from.

Plus, with two writers working on the project, we have twice the productivity output! And just think – in the time it takes to mentor one project, you’ll have boosted the careers of two writers! That’s two for the price of one! You can’t afford NOT to choose us.

Operators are Standing By
Have a question for us? Need an answer ASAP? We’re there for you night or day. Betsy lives on the East Coast and has a pre-schooler and an almost two hour commute, so she’s bright-eyed and bushy-tailed at 6:00 am Eastern Standard Time. Carrie is in California and has insomnia, so she’s usually awake until 1:00 am Pacific Time. That means one of us is awake and on call to knock out some bad-ass rewrites at all hours of the day (except from 4:00–6:00 am EST/1:00-3:00am PST).

And finally…

There Will be Cookies
(That’s right, we’re not above bribing you with baked goods. Lots of baked goods. Lots. Martha Stewart should be scared.)

PS big thanks to Dannie Morin and Christopher Keelty for putting together the PitchWars Mentee Contender Bio Blog Hop.


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